The Bay Area is one of the most unique places to live in the country. With a massive bay, views of the ocean, and several cities amassed in one location, there are millions of people who live here and are thriving as a result.
One factor that determines your enjoyment of life in the Bay Area is the health of your marriage. Having committed to this person for the rest of your life, this relationship is the most important one you will ever be involved in. As such, you must be willing to invest time and energy into caring for this connection.
Marriage is not an easy process. The challenges that come with life become more complicated when you are facing them in partnership with another person, though this support system is vital for facing many obstacles. The key is to have a healthy marriage that can be reliable and beneficial for your mental health. Let’s look at some of the signs of a healthy marriage for couples in the Bay Area.
Shared Values
The most important trait of any marriage is a shared value system. While you might get along with a significant other and have a lot of fun together, that ends up being meaningless if you do not agree on some of the fundamentals of your life philosophies. These are the deeper morals and principles that we hold. If you are in disagreement on these huge topics, then it becomes much harder to navigate smaller topics that are all informed by your value system. If you look at your spouse and know that many of your values are aligned, then your marriage is far more likely to last.
Mutual Trust
Trust is a pillar of marriage. Since you have committed to each other, you have both promised to be a stable foundation for the other. If one of you lacks trust in the other, the relationship can quickly fall apart. However, if you do feel like mutual trust is not present, that does not mean that the marriage is over. It might be wise to invest in CBT couples therapy to address the lack of trust and discover the reason why one of you is struggling to fully trust the other. In many cases, there are past experiences that must be worked through to achieve this aspect of a healthy marriage.
Individual Interests
This concept might seem counterintuitive. Didn’t we just say that couples should have shared values? Of course, but interests, while they should also be aligned in many cases, should also be separate in some cases. It is healthy for married couples to have their own passions that are not shared by their partner. Perhaps one of you likes to play a specific sport that the other has no interest in. Maybe one enjoys playing video games while the other is more interested in reading for pleasure. When you each have separate interests that the other encourages them in, it can be a sign of a trusting and happy marriage.
Non-Yelling Conflicts
If you never argue with your spouse, that is probably not a good thing. This often indicates that communication is being suppressed in some way. Disagreements are a natural part of any relationship. The sign of a strong marriage is when you can work through those disagreements without yelling at each other or getting intensely angry. Conflict resolution skills are valuable in a marriage, so practicing open and honest communication is critical to coming through these disagreements with your marriage intact. Learning these communication skills could take time, but they will help you work through numerous conflicts that arise during your marriage.
Consistent Dating
No matter how long you have been with your spouse, going on dates and making time for one another is a necessary aspect of the marriage. If you and your loved one often go out with each other in one-on-one settings, then this is building a solid foundation for the relationship. There are many things to do in the Bay Area with your loved one, including dance lessons, visits to the redwood forest, views of the Golden Gate Bridge, hundreds of dining opportunities, and endless recreational activities. Even packing up for a weekend getaway can be a great way to retreat and work on your relationship. The activity matters less than the quality time that the two of you are spending together.
Marriages Require Work, So Put in the Effort
In summary, healthy marriages form when both parties are willing to put in the work. This demonstrates that you are both invested in the other and unwilling to leave things as they are. Taking action to grow closer together is one sign of a healthy marriage. Others such as shared values, mutual trust, individual interests, conflict resolution, and persistent dating also indicate that you are in a strong relationship. If you lack any of these things, consider what steps can be taken to improve them.
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